~Poop On Jelly~

Our Family's Bitter/Sweet Life

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Christmas Update

We got a digital camera for Christmas, so I can be more high tech in my blogs now. One day I may try to figure out how to put a movie on my blog, since our camera has that capability. That will have to be a day that I have an over abundance of patience. That means that I will have to have had no contact with people for at least 24 hours. Not sure when that will be. Anyway, Christmas was great. I was on call, but did not have to go in. The kids loved their presents. The old lady and I loved them also. We tried to keep Jesus as the main focus, but that may have been lost a time or two. Here are some pictures to show you how Christmas went.

Christmas eve service. Sweet Pea loves to pose with her brothers.

The boys enjoy some of their presents. So does Papa in the backround

Sweat Pea gets her stroller, the rest of us no longer matter.

Except when she needs her next gift out of the box.

Here is the post Christmas fit. The only question each year is how many kid's will throw it.

All that work and expense and it is over in a flash. Well about a thousand flashes since dimples got a camera also.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Clam Chowder Anyone?

I woke up on Saturday morning about 4:30 a.m. I had a taste in my mouth that tasted like the stomach contents that I had been cleaning up for the previous 48 hours. I proceeded to sit in the bathroom for an hour and dry heaved a couple of times. I guess I just don't know how to "barf". I then sat up in a chair for another hour and went back to bed.

I slept until noon.

I haven't slept until noon since my freshman year in college. I then ate two pieces of pizza and a bowl of clam chowder. Then some cookies. Then I watched my Hoosiers dismantle the Kentucky inbreeders in college basketball. If that is sick, then I want some more. I don't know what the old lady has been whining about. I can say that since she already hates me.

I missed my work Christmas party today. I was too busy taking care of a lady who swallowed her packing gauze that was in her mouth after a tooth extraction. It was lodged in her esophagus. I love foreign body retrievals! My favorite was a psych patient who swallowed things for attention/to hurt herself. She swallowed pencils, batteries, pens, earrings, a wrist watch. My favorite was a pin, about the size of a quarter. It said something. It was not clear since the folds of her stomach were obscuring the words. We inflated with air. We could then slowly make out the words. "Jesus is the reason for the season." I guess she did not read it before she swallowed it.

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Last Man Standing

Well, Dimples is now barfing. I am now the only person in my family that has not thrown up in the past 24 hours. What are the odds of me making it through this?

The points against are that I have been in contact with a lot of barf in the last 24 hours. I also am a bit nauseated, but maybe that's because I have been in contact with a lot of barf in the last 24 hours.

The points for are that I have not thrown up due to illness since I was in kindergarten.

Will I succumb?

Still Sick

So, last night Bruiser started throwing up. Sweat Pea threw up some more in her bed, and on me. Then some more on me. And now the old lady is throwing up. And since I feel sorry for Bruiser, I have to watch the Wonder Pets all day. I think that might make me throw up.

Speaking of throwing up, a friend of ours has this same plague going around their house. Their almost five year old came up to their bed room and said his "stomach hurt". That is the kiss of death by the way. "My stomach hurts daddy", no other words strike more fear into me than those. Anyway, these friends steered their son into the bathroom. The kid got sick in the toilet and the splash effect was easy to clean up. They were congratulating themselves on a quick response, and were verbalizing their relief. Their son then says, "yeah, I didn't throw up much at all. I threw up a whole bunch down stairs".

Tuesday, December 4, 2007


My little girl has been throwing up through the night and morning.

The Puking has stopped.

The Diarrhea has started.

I need to go back to work.

Saturday, December 1, 2007

I hate using lotion. I don't know why. I used to think that it was girly or something. I guess most of the lotion that I grew up around was scented and that is where I came up with that. It may be that in my teenage years my skin was so oily that if I used lotion my clothes would just slip off of me. My hair was thick then also, so I don't know why I did not think my skin would change too. So in the last couple of years my hands, face, arms and back have been getting so dry I can't stand to sit around in my own skin. So I have gotten by my pre-conceived notions about lotion and started using it. I just use whatever the old lady has around, so yes it is scented usually. Anybody got a problem with that?

I work with a lot of patients with liver disease in my line of work. If these patients have a blockage in their bile duct, or have end stage liver disease (ESLD), they develop jaundice. Most of you probably know that is when their skin and eyes turn yellow. Often people get this liver disease because of exposure to Hepatitis B or Hepatitis C. So I have to protect myself to try to prevent getting these diseases. Yesterday I noticed my skin looked a little jaundice. Just a hint. I deal with most health problems with a handy tool I like to call denial. My wife is a bit of a hypocodriac, so we are a great pair. When the kids are sick she is sure they are dying, and I think they should walk it off.

So the wife put lotion on my back last night since I can't stand wearing clothes anymore, due to my alligator skin. Nudism is not really an option for me, so I needed the lotion. About 6:00 a.m. my wife went to the bathroom and noticed that she had streaks on her arms. Then she realized that my lotion had self tanner in it. When she told me, I knew where my jaundice had been coming from.

Did I mention that I have been putting some lotion on my dry face?

So I now look like George Hamilton, and my hate for lotion has been renewed.

Nudism, here I come.