~Poop On Jelly~

Our Family's Bitter/Sweet Life



Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Wacky Wrandom Wednesday

OK, so I can't rock the titles like the Mrs., but here goes my take at random thoughts/stories.
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First of all, after yesterday's post I feel like I need to explain that I wake up before the rest of the family and am gone to work before they get up. I can't have anyone thinking why is that lazy Nurse Boy not helping out. The Mrs. tells me to say goodbye to her before I leave every morning. So I give her a kiss on the cheek and tell her I love her most mornings before I leave. I get a slight interruption in her snoring and then she wipes my kiss off. She tells me she is rubbing it in, but I know what's up. Then she likes to complain that I don't say goodbye to her in the morning. So for all I know, SHE changed the radio to sports talk. She doesn't become lucid until about the fifth snooze.
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Along those same lines, the Mrs. "does not let" me sit on the bed or turn on the light in the morning. Some of you may be saying what do you mean she "does not let" you, aren't you a man with his own free will? My reply is, if there were a sleeping bear wouldn't you have the free will to poke it with a stick if you wanted? The answer is yes, but if you know what is best for you, you make sure that is not your will. Anyway, back to the story. One morning the Mrs. was waking up before me, so she slept on the side of the alarm. She usually hits the snooze about 6 times which is annoying enough, but this morning she did not hit the snooze for about a minute. I poked her and she growled, "I was listening to the story!" This from the woman who makes me get dressed in the dark every day. I should have changed it to sports talk just to keep her from listening to the story. I am not that smart though.
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Our trash is on the side of our house. I can't wait to have a house where I can park the cars in the garage, and keep the trash cans in there also. Our current house has poor insulation in the garage, so any smells in there circulate around the house. That is why we keep neither the trash nor the car in there. The other night I was taking the trash out and I heard fevered scratching on the wooden fence beside it. I figured it was a squirrel. I threw the bag and ran back in the house like a scarred little girl. Today is trash day, so last night I went to drag the cans down to the curb. As I approached the cans, I heard the same fevered scratching but it sounded bigger. I looked up and was in a stare down with a possum! He won and I ran. For a few seconds, I was fine with the trash not making it to the curb. Then I realized that thing was running from me also, so I worked up the nerve to go back to the trash cans. I turned on the car head lights and kicked the trash can a few times. I then dragged the cans to the curb. Does that make me a girlie man? I started dreaming of a .22 rifle and night vision goggles. When the kids heard about it today, my six year old said I should get a gun and shoot it. I told him that if I missed and shot a neighbor that would definitely put us on the out with the neighbors. I am a little worried about having the same problem solving skills as my six year old though.
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The wife and I have made it 11 straight days with at least 30 min. on the treadmill. I figured I would walk half the time and run half the time. Then I remembered I am obese and out of shape. No, I am not looking for anyone to tell me I am not fat. My doctor charted that I was obese 20 pounds ago. It's a fact, not a feeling. The best I have done so far is I ran for 11 of the 30 minutes a couple days ago. Not 11 minutes straight. 6 minutes straight, and then 3, and then 2. I am averaging 15 minute miles. I remember when I could run a mile in under 6 minutes. I do already feel better though. Our incentive is we can by a foo foo coffee after every six days we workout. That is more for the Mrs. For me, the motivation is I get to watch whatever I want on TV for the half an hour I am on the treadmill. Maybe I will make up some story about training for a marathon and go down there for a couple hours a day.

10 comments:

Imperfect Mom said...

MotH says he feels your pain. He too shares a bed with a sleeping bear.

Since I would run from a possum, and I am indeed a girl, I guess the answer is yes.......that's makes you a girly man.

High five on the treadmill usage. I am a sloth.

mommy4life said...

Better to run from possum than bit by possum....

Theresa said...

As Sir Nottaguy-Imadad commented previously, I am the snooze smacking bear in our bed! I HATE mornings! (They wouldn't be so bad if they didn't have to arrive before 9 a.m.)

I have a dog that takes care of all of the possum/raccoon/stray dog in the trash issues. I don't have to worry about it. Oh, and he'd be happy to take care of the neighbors, too! He's an equal-opportunity biter!

Boy Mom said...

I thought y'all weren't that 'in' with the neighbors anyways ;)

Isn't it funny that no matter how non-weapon solutions Mom and Dad are that little boys always go for full military combat solutions.

Mrs Lemon said...

Is that a cumulative 30 minutes between the two of you over eleven days? ;)

Mr. and Mrs. Nurse Boy said...

I DON'T snore ;p I am NOT a bear. And, has anyone tried to sleep with someone sitting on the bed while putting their shoes and socks on? You begin to dream of tornados. Or earthquakes. Nurse Boy is not exactly a dainty little ballerina... I'm just saying....

The Mrs.

Imperfect Mom said...

For the record, Nurse Boy, you totally deserved the "not a dainty little ballerina" comment after telling the whole world that the Mrs. snores.

Sir Nottaguy-Imadad said...

I not only turn on the light, I turn on the radio and sit on the bed. I could breakdance in the morning and it wouldn't faze my wife.
I thought all men had the problem solving skills as a six year old. Although for some that would be a compliment.

Becky said...

Good job on the treadmill!

My SIL is from Honduras, and lapses into Spanish when she gets freaked out or excited. One day she came in from taking out the trash all wided-eyed and gasping for breath yelling, "Ratoni!" It took my BIL a while to figure out it was their resident possum, lol.

Your kiddos all have FABULOUS eyes and are very photogenic.

Oh, and I looooove "Poop-on-Jelly", lol.

Chris said...

By the time I got to the end of the possum story, I had 2 kids and a husband standing around me going "What ? What?? What's so funny?!?" and I couldn't catch my breath to answer them.

Good job to both of you on your treadmill skillz.